I used to procrastinate. A lot. It was what defined my elementary and high school years. I went home almost every day to just play video games. Roblox, Call of Duty, GTA, Need for Speed, War Thunder, I made friends both in person and online just by playing them.
But since entering and graduating from college, I haven’t had the urge to play video games as much as I used to. In fact, I almost certainly try to avoid them. Because I’m afraid of going back to my old self. Where I would toil away on the computer for hours on end and miss out on bonding time with family and friends.
It’s not just video games I procrastinate on; I’m also dearly interested in and captivated by TV shows and movies (I don’t procrastinate on books, though). Even now, it’s a struggle to think of what I want to do for the day. I tend to look at things to see whether they’ll make me productive. Whether I’ll learn something from it. If not, I end up feeling miserably lazy, and think I could have made a better decision.
But does it always have to be a better decision? Context helps. Sometimes people choose what satisfies them in the moment. Even in love. Because when you end up choosing something better, you don’t end up at the finish line. The post will keep moving as you heighten your standards. Instead, settle for what’s best for now and only look forward if it makes sense at present.
While I may procrastinate, it doesn’t make me a “bad” person or someone who “wasted their whole life for nothing”. Maybe that time was meant to give some personal space. Or maybe it could be an outlet to blow away all my pressures. Nevertheless, I’m grateful for being part of this wonderful universe.